I can’t believe it’s been this long . . . it still stills my heart every day. It’s both easier and harder now with Joseph here. It keeps me busy and present and also helps me to cherish this sweet little boy all the more. But, it is also a constant reminder. Would Christopher be the same rough and tumble little boy, would Mary have the same blue eyes? Questions that bring a smile and tears at the same time.

I still struggle with the seemingly ever-present question “is he your first?” Such a simple question but so hard to answer. Most often, I simply say yes. It’s too difficult to explain and it’s most often people that want a simple answer. Little do they know of the tiny daggers that sting when I deny them. Please, my sweet angels, know that I will always think of you as my first (and second) born. I love you Mary and Christopher, Happy Birthday my loves.